About art work:
 

Derelict childhood is a series of work, previously installed as a small room, floor based installation (300 x 120 cm). Both Tricycle and Home stand alone as outcomes with Tricycle being the main communicator.

 

The works communicate relations, deriving personally from the experiences of childhood to adulthood and the developing understandings of life that comes with it. The phenomenology of self-discovery is present within the work. We are told that when we are conscious, we are aware of ourselves and core ideas of which our inner speech should be reflective of. However, our inner speech seems to have a mind of its own sometimes, resurfacing the deep and complex layers of our experiences of the world that in present consciousness may be confusing in understanding. Additionally, it covers conversations on details of PTSD and the visual lasting effects that stay stagnant in the mind as the adult brain grows. We leave our childhood presently behind; however, the experiences will never leave. There are feelings of being trapped in specific moments, unable to leave in attempts to understand them. They become derelict and decaying, waiting for childhood to return. Fear is held on within memories. The works display attempts to put our “childhood” back together from what we know, but the memories are distorted through the face of time. It makes you question if we ever do recall our memories factually or if they have been shaped continuously through our growing understanding of life. No matter how much you try to get back to that innocent comfort, it seems impossible.

 

The visual components within Tricycle display a lonely, decaying doll, uncomfortably sat and showcasing childlike qualities. These are shown within the hands and feet, with the representation of how children would draw them; the toes and fingers not being completely proportionate and the sizing of the body being out of scale compared to the rest. In addition, the doll has a nostalgic feel being a toy but with a sinister twist shown in the display of the hands and feet appearing decaying. The latex used for these components are skin-like, encouraging imagery to feel human. The makeup of the outfit is derived from scrap fabrics found in a family home, stitched together messily in a child-like craft appearance. Both elements of childhood and adulthood are combined but uncomfortably separate. The struggling attempts to get back to that innocent comfort has caused the structuring to be distorted. The doll embodies these mental attempts, still holding on tightly even when it becomes apparent it’s time to let go.

 

Home is made up of an abandoned dolls house, displaying the markings of play in past times. Over time its use has no longer been valid, showing it to be decaying. Within the house shows multiple uncomfortably looking latex doll heads, embodying the mind of my personal thoughts of feeling trapped and panicked of letting go. There are multiple memories, multiple realisations and discoveries built up from time of the childhood mind to adulthood. They are stuck in this decaying toy, once made for play but now renders useless.